i was mistaken. i dont have any feelings for that guy i was talking about, the one i had the dream about. i was just being over dramatic. i dont like it when guys get over me and move on, but now i just dont care, and i dont care because i dont want to. it's dumb. like really, where did i think it was guna go? we broke up for good reasons. same with my other ex. i dont really wanna be with anyone. and by that i mean i dont want to be in a relationship, or friendships. im just kind of done with the worlds bullshit. like i just see beyond all the pointless things now. in a year i'm never going to see any of these fucked up people ever again. and some of them are nice i suppose, but whats the point in building up friendships that are only going to be lost? to have fun now?? well i'm not having fun, so why try anymore. everyone thinks i'm just so caught up in myself and that i think it's "all about me"... well if thats so, and u always thought that, y the fuck did you hang with me? thats fucking stupid. well i'm guna listen to what they say and just worry about myself. fuck their problems. i dont care. i've got my own, thank you.
so yea, im just confirming that i dont really feel much but extreme apathy right now which is what i wanted, so thats really good, and i honestly dont wanna do music at the moment like at all. i'm getting really pissed off and fed up with it all and actually believing that im guna make it... but i suppose i wont do anything else with my time so i might as well. i just kinda dont care if im homeless or poor or dead really cuz i kind of already feel dead. well... thats "all about me". bye
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