sometimes i ask myself if this is really what i wanted. i asked for everything i have, but i didn't know how painful it would all be. my life is complicated. my dad, Mike, and my mom, Cate, were married for about 17, or 18 years, but including the time that they dated 22 years together. then along comes me, in 1994. then my sister in 1999. fairy tail typical american family, rite? yes... very much so. even more so now...
for 2 and a half years my dad has been cheating on my mom with a whore named Anita. this doesn't bother me, cuz i never really was involved with my family. but now their making me involved. aparently it doesn't satisfy them that im not feeling enough pain as it is already so they make me care about their problems. my dad refuses to tlak to my dad, so she makes him text... and in doing this, no true feelings are revealed. so she takes her anger towards him out on me. my dad is an irrational bastard.. actually thats quite literal, because his dad died when my dad was only like 5 or 10 or somthing... but he just gets mad and flipps out on everything and everyone around him. i haven't had a good relationship with my dad since i was 10 and now he thinks -at the peek of our family distruction- is a good time to bond, to connet bridges that were burned long ago that now have mold and other rotting matterials on them. i hate him. i hate my mom.
and then theirs my sister, emily. shes so obnoxious. she screams shouts, yells, throughs fits... it's weird and annoying. well... nuff said.
matt... Matt is the essence of my being. he is the one thing that keeps me sane. the one reason why i don't rip every hair of my head. the one reason why i try to love myself and respect myself. in all these things i do for love. i did not know what love was until i met him. matt is the one thing keeping me from suving a bullet through my mom, dad, and sisters head. for him i live, for him a save.
he saves me
i save him too
this is my life at 15...
this is me and matt
he is mine, so don't think of stealing him,he is a quaerterback,
he is sexy,
he is my love,
he is love,
he is everything i never knew i needed,
he is everything i can never live without,
he is the soul of my being,
he is going to be my husband someday,
he is matt<3
